Joan was quizzical
Studied pataphysical
Science in the home
Late nights all alone with a test tube
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Maxwell Edison
Majoring in medicine
Calls her on the phone
Can I take you out to the pictures, Joan?
But, as she's getting ready to go
A knock comes on the door

Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer
Came down upon her head.
Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer
Made sure that she was dead.

Back in school again
Maxwell plays the fool again
Teacher gets annoyed
Wishing to avoid
An unpleasant scene
She tells Max to stay
When the class has gone away
So, he waits behind
Writing fifty times
I must not be so
But, when she turns her back on the boy
He creeps up from behind

Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer
Came down upon her head.
Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer
Made sure that she was dead.

P.C. Thirty one
Said, We've caught a dirty one
Maxwell stands alone
Painting testimonial pictures
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Rose and Valerie
Screaming from the gallery
Say he must go free
The judge does not agree
And he tells them so
But, as the words are leaving his lips
A noise come from behind

Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer
Came down upon his head.
Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer
Made sure that he was dead
Woh woh woh

Silver hammer.

